User blog:Ubersketch/Help with going into advanced googology?

Stuff like OCFs, analysis, and more complex definitions. The reason why I'm asking this is because I have a bit of a block when it comes to understanding stuff. Like, I've went through Cantor's Attic and the lot to understand things but I kind of can't understand things. Also another reason is because of my pitifully low self-esteem. Like FIH isn't enough for me, and I really want to feel included in more discussions and contribute more to Googology so  can feel more satisfied.