User blog:Nnn6nnn/Well... This is gonna be awkward

It's Nathan. Yes, I'm still alive.

Let me start by saying thank you. Even was I was immature and completely left because of one fight. I was not in a good time when that "thing" occurred and I didn't want to risk staying with him still on here. I forgive him for he said, and I don't hold anything against him, but he is honestly not the only reason I left.

I love googology, don't get me wrong. In fact, I have still been working ruthlessly on my textbook since Novenmber, 2016. However, the type of googology here, where it's mostly people coming and going and phases occuring isn't as exciting for me. I like the kind of stuff on Sbiis' site. The nature of number and how ambiguity (with number's value) is kinda ok when it gets to large numbers. I wan't getting that from here.

Another reason was that I didn't feel needed. I asked Vel! once if I could be promoted to some other role, but nothing happened, and I took that the wrong way. But still, a lot of my edits on the wiki was just tedius grammar or small math fixes that didn't ever really contribute anything to googology as a whole. The only thing I have going for me is the textbook, which even that is mostly unoriginal stiff taken from research and stuff found on Google Scholar.

A few hours ago, I started putting up pictures for number representation. I couldn't help but think to myself "why am I doing this? It does no help to anyone." So, that's why I left, I just didn't feel needed, nor do I now.

So there you go. I heard that some of you have interest in helping me. THANK YOU! I need it. Email me @ googologycourse@gmail.com and I'll be more than happy to share the document with you. I really need a good explanation for FGH right now. The textbook has already done a bit of ordinals and SGH.

Before I finish this cringy post, thank you to everyone who was kind to me that day. I didn't derserve it becuase I wasn't exactly that kind back to him. You really didn't have to do that, but I greatly appreciate it!

Regards,   (talk) 23:57, May 8, 2018 (UTC)