User blog comment:Edwin Shade/Interesting Things I Can Do/@comment-31837178-20180123230749

It actually pains me to read this, because this sounds too much like they young me (back in prehistoric time). Here's what I have to offer:

1.  KobLev's initial comment says it better than I ever could - I'm going to bookmark this. "You are cool when you are being yourself" should be everybody's personal mantra. I've been around long enough to see this; it's so universally true I'd call it a tautology.

2.  From your comments, it sounds like you may have a vicious cycle of perfectionism and procrastination. I go through the same thing even now, despite my best efforts, and all I can advise you is (a) try to remember that "perfect can be the enemy of the good" and let yourself get unstuck and (b) don't let this cycle get you anxiously angry and agitated at yourself. Chip away at the challenge and practice doing things slow and steady.

3.  Good points from Chronolegends on taking care of yourself. I'd especially be careful about getting enough good restful sleep. Deep sleep/REM cycles clear the extraneous crap from your brain, leaving you better able to keep a balanced life in your waking hours.

Edwin, your posts to the Googology site have been a blessing for me as a sometimes googologist/amateur mathematician. I've been able to find something enjoyable during this time in my life when I am forced to work far away from my wife and friends, and your googological insights have helped me keep to conquer some math that I thought I'd have trouble with at my advanced age. I'm hoping some of these words from myself and the others here will do as much good for you as you have done for me.

Thanks.