User blog comment:Ubersketch/Who should be a mod?/@comment-39541634-20190831191133/@comment-39541634-20190909201817

I completely agree. Especially with the part where you said "learn from what happened and how to become better people"... to which I will also add "learn from what happened so we can become a stronger community".

The question is: Are we willing to learn? Are we willing to discuss the issues in a mature fashion? Can we have a constructive candid discussion about these things, without people yelling "drama! oh noes!" and without people pointing fingers and looking for ways to "win" some kind of blame game?

Open communications is the key to solving these things.

Here is an example that involves none of the present people on this wiki:

There was a time, when the math pros (including myself) decided they had enough of the trolling here and decided to create an alternative site.

Everything was set up, and I was invited to co-moderate that site.

Soon I discovered that the owner of the site really *really* dislikes me for some reason (which is odd, given that he was the guy who invited me to co-moderate the site in the first place). It was so bad that many times he simply refused to communicate with me, even when discussing important site management issues.

I told him that we can't run the site like this. I told him that as a team, we can't afford this kind of non-communication. I also asked him what I can do to remedy the situation. He completely ignored that, too.

I then asked him, if he feels this way, why does he keep me as a co-mod. Once again: @crickets@.

To this day, I have no idea what the heck happened there. I have no idea why this guy hates me so much, nor do I understand why he appointed a guy he completely loathed as a co-mod. Eventually, the site died out, which is not surprising given the fact that there was no actual management team to run it.

Months later, I've stumbled upon a discord (not the googology one) where I found just how deep his problem was with me. And to this day, I still have ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHAT I'VE DONE WRONG, because the guy refuses to have any kind of honest discussion with me.

Now isn't this a completely fu*ked up little situation? What would you have done, if such a thing happened to you? There's no way out of such a mess.

And the moral of the story:

Don't be afraid to openly communicate whatever is on your mind, and don't mock others (or worse: ignore them) when they do the same. Such frankness isn't "drama" or "seeking attention"(*). On the contrary: It is an essential part of maintaining a healthy community.

(the good news is that we're already infinitely better at this then we were seven months ago. Keep it up!)